I Still Can't Squat

When I first got my injury and then subsequent surgery 6 months ago, I pictured things to be a little different by the time that I reached this point. I thought I would have all my motion back and I'd be starting my run progression and other than getting used to the impact again, my knee would not be talking to me quite so much. Wrong!!!

I think that I have been very patient with myself. I've adapted to having a stiff knee. Perhaps a little too well. I realized today that I still can't squat down onto the floor using both knees. I have to kick my left one out behind me and do a sort of lunge or one knee down sort of thing. This is sad. I was in such great shape last summer and I'm not anywhere close to that anymore. (Yes, this is me feeling sorry for myself.)

I really should have gone to physical therapy a couple months ago after I left my last clinical. Since then, my progress has slowed a bit and I think that I have actually lost muscle in my left leg. The motion continues to get better but not as fast as it would if I had more time. This clinical, even though I'm working the same number of hours this week, has been a lot more draining than the last one. I think a lot of it is because I worked through my break this winter and went straight to the site that I am currently at. That and the patients are a lot weaker and sicker. It just zaps the energy right out of me to be there. Then I come home and I'm too tired to work out as hard as I could be. Mind you, I still work out and ride my bike almost daily. It is just by the time I get to mid-week, I'm exhausted and all I want to do is sleep. Or vegetate in front of the TV. I've already gotten sick twice in the past 3 weeks.

I seriously just need a break.

I'm headed to the doctors on Monday: my surgeon for my 6 month check up and a family practice doctor for a script for physical therapy. THe plan is to start physical therapy sessions and try to aggressively get back my strengh and motion. If that doesn't work, I'm planning on getting an MRI to determine if there is something in my knee joint that is blocking the motion. I don't know where I am going to find time to fit all this in since I work 8:30-5:30 five days per week. But I have to make the effort because if I don't have my health, then I don't have anything.